Peppermint Puss

Written by Douglas Firestein

In these modern times
Turbulent economic days
One must (must!) be creative
Find new instruments of pain

All it takes is a blunt edge
A simple projectile
Makin’ them suckas scream
Sure brings my face a smile

Got me a bag of candy canes
Sharp and to the point
Gonna ram one in each hole
Get ya feelin’ fresh and moist

Your friends will fear for their life
I’ll make them scream like a wuss
Spread your legs and spray them
With my brand new peppermint puss

I bet you’re real confused
About which hole is sprayin’
It’s not one very fragrant
And that is all i’m sayin’

The scent can make you gag
Stop a sucka in their tracks
But once that minty freshness hits
There ain’t no turnin’ back!

Got me a bag of candy canes
Sharp and to the point
Gonna ram one in each hole
Get ya feelin’ fresh and moist

Your friends will fear for their life
I’ll make them scream like a wuss
Spread your legs and spray them
With my brand new peppermint puss

WITH MY BRAND NEW PEPPERMINT PUSS!

WITH MY BRAND NEW PEPPERMINT PUSS!

Your friends will fear for their life
I’ll make them scream like a wuss
Spread your legs and spray them
With my brand new peppermint puss