I bought you a pretzel
When we went to the mall
You seemed so distracted
While you ate

I returned from the bathroom
When I saw you sneak off
By the grace of God that
Sucka will pay!

You have your excuses
But they fall on deaf ears
There is only one thing
That I wanna hear

I’m gonna tie, tie, tie
Two bells to his pecker
We gonna drive, drive, drive
To the fair

I’ll ask a midget worker
To punch him in the scrotum
Let the bells ring out
Loud and clear

For it’s the chimes of liberty
Getting that bitch out of my life!
Yeah its the chimes of liberty
Better ice them balls tonight!

I watched Mr. Handsome
Crumble to the ground
I couldn’t help myself
So I laughed out loud

I helped the sucka stand
The midget punched him again
This time when the bells rang
I saluted my little friend

You had your excuses
But they fell on deaf ears
There was only one thing
That I wanted to hear

I’m gonna tie, tie, tie
Two bells to his pecker
We gonna drive, drive, drive
To the fair

I’ll ask a midget worker
To punch him in the scrotum
Let the bells ring out
Loud and clear

For it’s the chimes of liberty
Getting that bitch out of my life!
Yeah its the chimes of liberty
Better ice them balls tonight!

I can’t believe it
(I can’t believe)
What my life’s become
I didn’t need it
(I didn’t need)
But I’m doing your step mom

I’m gonna tie, tie, tie
Two bells to his pecker
We gonna drive, drive, drive
To the fair

I’ll ask a midget worker
To punch him in the scrotum
Let the bells ring out
Loud and clear

For it’s the chimes of liberty
Getting that bitch out of my life!
Yeah its the chimes of liberty
Better ice them balls tonight!